10 Mindful and Powerful Tips to Boost Your Confidence
In episode 55 of The Mindful Kind podcast, I shared my thoughts on how mindfulness can empower us to change our self-talk and grow our self-esteem and confidence. However, I also wanted to share some powerful (and mindful!) tips you can start implementing today to further increase your confidence and help you genuinely believe in yourself.
1. Be your biggest cheerleader
While it can be tempting to turn to others when your self-confidence needs a boost, instead give yourself some time to reflect on why you believe you are worthy. Write down as many good things about yourself as you can think of, from thoughtful things you’ve done for others to aspects you love about your personality. This isn’t a time to be shy or inhibited- declare it wildly and believe it just as fiercely.
2. Reward your self-belief with positive self-talk
Whenever you consciously choose to believe you are enough (rather than accepting any thoughts which say you aren’t), reward yourself. For example, “Hey, I just told myself that I am good enough and I’m doing the best I can- that’s awesome! I’m doing a great job.”
3. Use your favourite mood boosters
Having a rough day on the tumultuous journey of following your dreams? Don’t worry, most of us do! Remind yourself that it will pass and give yourself a mood-boosting time out. Listen to an upbeat song, go to your favourite café, play with your children or a pet, attend a rejuvenating yoga class, treat yourself to a pampering session, or whatever else makes you feel really, really good!
4. Try a power pose
In a comfortable and quiet place, practice using a power pose. Notice how it makes you feel- perhaps supported, strong, confident, or steadfast. Allow yourself to explore this feeling and embrace it. Our body language can perpetuate how we feel, so make a conscious choice to stand up straighter, roll your shoulders back, lift your chin and keep your arms open.
5. Practice going outside your comfort zone, a little bit at a time
When I was terrified of public speaking, I didn’t jump straight in to speaking in front of hundreds of people straight away! I slowly built up my confidence in small steps, first by creating a podcast, then by speaking in front of my family and, finally, I spoke at an event. Don’t forget to practice self-care after each step outside your comfort zone to encourage feelings of safety and security to help strengthen your confidence for the next step.
6. Use a simple mindfulness technique when you’re feeling overwhelmed
Stress, fear, uncertainty and overwhelm are often confidence crushers. If you notice your confidence is waning in the face of these feelings, practice mindfulness to bring yourself back to a place of calm, focus and clarity. For example:
Try a breathing practice
Go for a mindful walk
Tune in to your senses (notice 5 things you can see, hear and feel)
Have a mindful cup of tea
Do a meditation
7. Don’t be afraid of being confident
It might seem odd, but I used to feel afraid of appearing confident because I confused it with arrogance. However, confidence and arrogance are not the same thing! Here are a few ways I distinguish the two:
Confidence encourages other people to feel more confident, too. For example, if your boss at work is confident about an upcoming project, his team will likely feel more confident about it, too. Arrogance, on the other hand, is often intimidating and drains the confidence of others. If your boss is arrogant about an upcoming project, his team may end up feeling inferior, uncertain and insecure.
Confidence comes across as more genuine, open and accepting of others, while arrogance tends to seem condescending, judgemental and defensive.
Confidence is usually a result of inner acceptance- confident people are sure of their values and beliefs and are open to feedback and growth. Arrogance is more often displayed as a result of external validation and can easily be threatened.
8. Keep a “confidence token”
I’ve had several different confidence tokens and tools over the years- a new dress to wear to my first speaking event, a water bottle, a quote card, a necklace which I always wear on meaningful occasions, a perfume… These tools and tokens remind me to take a deep breath, think a positive affirmation and take a moment to feel grounded and supported.
9. Be kind
Kindness is my favourite confidence booster! When I make the conscious choice to go out of my way to be kind to someone else, I feel good. When I feel good, I exude confidence. Choose to be kind by sharing a smile, listening to someone with openness, buying a coffee for a friend, leaving a thoughtful comment on social media, calling a loved one to see how they are.
10. Believe you are a confident person
You can try your hardest to feel confident and to do things which boost your self-esteem, but at the end of the day, if you’re telling yourself that you aren’t a confident person, then you won’t be able to truly embrace it.
I never used to see myself as a confident person- I was quiet, shy, introverted and deep down, I believed that I wouldn’t ever be truly confident.
I encourage you to ask yourself- do you think you are a confident person?
If the answer is no, then try to consider the following questions:
How can I start to see myself as a more confident person?
What can I do to strengthen my self-belief?
Which thoughts need to change before I can see myself as genuinely confident?
Sometimes, it’s not what we actually do that defines our confidence- it’s how we see ourselves. If you can start to see yourself as a more confident person, then the rest will follow.
